What a Morning, and it's only 10am!

Glen woke up in a not too good of a mood.. I think because he saw that I was dressed and near ready to go out. That means to him, oh oh, day care.
I got him up and out of the bed and got Connor ready and all the bags prepped and ready to go. And then worked on him.

We wrestled with putting on his shirt and pants, then the socks and shoes were a real chore. I had to have him on the couch under my left arm, with his feet out so that I could put his socks and shoes on. The whole time he's screaming his head off.

I went to put his jacket on.. that was another struggle and a half.. he tried to get out of it once he was in it too. I had to pick him up from the livingroom and bring him to the landing on the opposite side of the baby gate. Now mind you, this landing is about 3 ft square. and we have an end table in the corner of the landing.. so that leaves about a foot of space on the side closest to the baby gate and about a foot in front of the first step to go downstairs.
I had Connor in his car seat on the side closest to the top of the stairs so that I could put Glen down in front of the gate. so that I could grab Connor and nudge Glen down the stairs.. didn't work that way.
Glen fought with kicks and grabs and screaming and crying trying to get past me to get through the gate and back into the livingroom. I leaned forward enough to close the gate without Glen getting passed me. I put the two big bags over my shoulder (Connor's diaper bag, and my briefcase) and then grabbed Connor's car seat with my right hand and turned to Glen to take his hand. Glen was hanging on the baby gate screaming and trying to pull the gate open by shaking it back and forth in both hands. I instantly thought of someone in prison holding onto the bars and trying to shake the bars loose. That's what Glen was doing. I tried to take his hand and he only pulled and batted me away.
I put Connor back down on the landing and picked up the kicking and screaming Glen, and held him under my left arm, and took Connor in my right hand and carried them both down the stairs with the 2 bags over my left shoulder and the one lunch bag for me on my right wrist.

I made it down the stairs without falling. Got to the bottom and opened the door.. put Connor's seat down on the floor in the small entry way and turned to close the door putting Glen down at the same time. I had just enough time to lock the door before closing it with such speed, cuz Glen was reaching for the door before I even had him completely down. He almost reached it before I closed it... meaning he almost got back into the apartment.
He clutched the doorknob and started to yank on it.. screaming and crying the entire time.
Then when he couldn't get that to open he tried to hold onto the door with his arms spread wide against the door and his cheek pressed up to the door facing it.

I stopped to breath and to call Mark so he could hear what I was dealing with. After him letting me off some steam and him hearing the piercing scream and crying coming from Glen.. I hung up and picked Glen up then Connor, making my way to the car.
I had to stop three times to adjust Glen cuz he was slipping from his wiggling in my left arm. Which by the way is not my strongest arm.

I get to the car and open the door for him... he doesn't want to go in.. I take the receiving blanket that he's holding onto for dear life and put it in his car seat... he chases after it and I pick him up and put him in the seat. He goes stiff as a board and won't let me strap or buckle him in. I leave him to his own devises and take Connor to the other side of the car and put his car seat into the base that's in the car. I take the bags and put them in the back of the wagon, then walk back around to contend with Glen, cuz he can't ride around without being buckled in.
It took so long, that I don't know how long it took to get him into that seat.

When I opened the door, Glen was literally clinging to the back of the passenger front seat and was flush against it. Crying his eyes out. I pried him from the back of the seat and placed him in his car seat.. or so I thought. He got stiff as a board.. I was able to put the straps around his shoulders and then clip the chest clip. but then I had to clip him into the buckle that's in-between his legs.. you know, the 5 point harness deal. Well he had his pelvis thrust forward (remember, stiff as a board position so he was flat and wouldn't bend), and I couldn't get him to bend enough to buckle the bottom buckle. then with all the struggle of his wiggling, he started to slide down in the seat.. so I had to pick him up enough to put him back up onto the seat without getting the shoulder straps undone.
After much ado and screaming from him and screaming from me begging him to bend his body I was able to buckle him.

I got in the car on my side and turned to him, he was quiet and looking at me like he hated me.
We got to the daycare and he got out of the car whimpering. We walk up the steps and into his classroom and he starts to cry. I get his coat off of him and put it in his cubby hole and walk over to the other side to drop Connor off. Glen is crying and following me at the heels of my feet. I set Connor up in one of the swings and then put his car seat in the play pen and set that up so they can put him in the car seat to nap in.. since he still needs to sleep elevated cuz of the mucus filled lungs.
Glen is crying and at my side the whole time. I swing Connor in the swing for a bit and he falls asleep and Glen calms enough that he's not crying, still hasn't left my side, but calmer.
I warn the women that he'll start up again as soon as I leave, they suggest that next time I just sorta drop him off and disappear so that it's less painful for him. I say yeah. and leave it at that. Personally I don't agree with the band aid affect (ripping him away from me with harsh speed and ignoring him) while he's still sickly and not eating properly. If he was fine and just being a pain and wanting his way, that's another story, but right now, he's sick and doesn't want these strange LOUD people hovering in his face trying to make him stop crying. He wants his Mom or his Dad. So I wait until he's semi calm before leaving, this way yes he cries still or more after I go, but he's not at the point where he's choking and gagging about to throw up crying. Which he would be if I ripped him away like he was nothing but an old dirty used up band aid.

I talked to Mark when I got to work. He's really a sweetheart and a really great man. I'm so thankful that I have him.
He doesn't like how upset this whole thing makes me, and he's very understanding about it. He's also concerned about Glen and how this might be effecting him mentally. Cuz we know it's putting a strain on me and Glen at this point. Emotionally and obviously physically cuz the kid and I are still sick with colds that we can't get rid of. Besides the colds being colds, when you are stressed and you're all worked up, it's just easier for the bugs to get into your system and work their wonders. least I think so.
We talked for a bit and he said that he would understand, support, and accept or agree if you will, if I wanted to give notice here at work to be home with the boys. That at this point we would be able to work things out financially, but that our health and mental well being is most important to him.
I told him that I would give it till June. Glen could use some experience and maybe this will pass, but even still, we need the little extra money that I provide to pay some bills and we would need the time to switch from cable modem to DSL cuz it's cheaper. And to cancel some of our pay channels on cable. so our bill would go down.
So we'll see come June if I'm home to enjoy my birthday or if I will be here at work that day.

In the meantime.. I'll fight with Glen for a little while longer. Maybe after he's not sick, and he's at day care more days than he's not, maybe he'll be better about it or even want to go. If not and come June it's all the same and I'm still fighting with him and still getting colds from other kids and we are all miserable.. then I'll put in my notice.

Mark's pay increase and availability to get medical coverage makes it possible for us to try to make the attempt at me staying home or getting a low paying part time evening job. But so the kids won't have to be in day care. Mark agrees that there are always mommy and me classes to get the boys around other kids and socialize without the stress of mommy leaving them behind. Then we would work on preschool when he's 4 years old instead of this mess that we are dealing with now. Might be easier to explain to him and for him to understand that we love him and that he's coming home, that he's not being left there forever.

What a morning.....